The following is a little message to the McCain campaign care of the Merriam-Webster dictionary:
Main Entry: vet
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form(s): vet•ted; vet•ting
Date [of entry to the dictionary]: 1891
1 a: to provide veterinary care for (an animal) or medical care for (a person) b: to subject (a person or animal) to a physical examination or checkup
2 a: to subject to usually expert appraisal or correction
— vet•ter noun
Please look at definition 2b. Thank you.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081017/ap_on_re_us/joe_the_plumber
According to this article by John Seewer of the associated press, not only is Joe not a licensed plumber, he isn’t even a Joe. His name is Samuel J. Wurzelbacher and “Joe” appears to be a nickname, a horribly dull nickname. Just to make things funnier, this archetype of the hard working American success story . . . owes nearly $1200 in back taxes and the state has filed a claim to repossess his house.
How the hell did the McCain campaign not know any of this before they made him a national TV star? I feel sorry for Mr. Wurzelbacher. His life is now going to be turned completely upside down because John McCain is an idiot.
On a separate matter, a friend of mine who happens to be a fellow English major finally watched the VP debate on YouTube. The 90 minute debate took us about 2 hours to watch because my friend keep rewinding to see if Sarah Palin made any sense the second time around. She didn’t. He also rewound to remind himself of the actual question and see if anyone actually answered it. They usually didn’t. We also had a dictionary open and were pausing to check is what Sarah Palin was using her words correctly. Indecently, “maverick” is not a verb. We assume the definition of maverick that the Governor was using is:
2. a lone dissenter, as an intellectual, an artist, or a politician, who takes an independent stand apart from his or her associates.
Although we can’t rule out
1. Southwestern U.S. an unbranded calf, cow, or steer, esp. an unbranded calf that is separated from its mother.
Even assuming the former is the intended definition, the idea of a “Team of mavericks” is nonsensical because you can't have a team of lone dissenters.
At one point in the debate, Gov. Palin referred to Sen. Biden as Sen. Obiden, accidently combining the names of both members of the Democratic ticket. Since all's fair in love and Freudian slips, the Republican VP candidate will now and forever be known as “Sarah McPalin!”
Since that name sounds incredibly Scottish (and I never pass up a chance to steal a bit from Blackadder) I present the following conversation to be read in a heavy stereotypical Scottish accent:
Me: Ach! Sarah McPalin! Yer tha spittin image ah yerself! How stands that mighty army, tha Clan McPalin?
Sarah McPalin: Thar both well.
Me: Aye, good. Ay always thought Rory and Angus war such fine boys.
Sarah McPalin: Angus isa girl.
Me: Oh . . . eh . . . dang.
Thank you thank you, I’m here till Monday.
In related news, stay tuned for the recipe to my newest invention, the McPalin sandwich. (Why yes, I am going to milk this joke for all it's worth. Thanks for asking.)
